‘Pressing in’ on Good Friday
Grieving with the angels.
I was deeply moved by a small marble relief sculpture of the “Deposition” by Antonio d’Este, c1800, after a Canova model, that I saw at the Chicago Art Institute, and I had to make a drawing study (below) of a little detail so I could contemplate it more.
My above detail drawing is of a small, almost hidden, angel grieving the lifeless body of Christ. Once you spot him, you feel like you’ve intruded on a private moment.
See if you can spot the angel in the original marble.
This little angel is almost hiding himself, pressing into the shoulder of Christ, burying his face, as if wanting to melt into Jesus’ arm unnoticed, so he can be one with Christ in death.
What a moment of imagery! And this from an angel, who knew that the future held the Resurrection, did not let the death of Christ pass without fully entering into the grief of the cost of sin for the Son of God.
It’s a powerful witness for me to “press in” to my grief, my cost of sin, my bewilderment of the cross.
It’s not only okay to let myself feel these feelings, but it is necessary, in order to deepen my desire to attach myself to Christ, press into Him with my sorrows, and let myself feel small, hiding within the wounds of His love for me.
“Intra tua vulnera absconde me.”
“Within your wounds hide me.”
(From The Anima Christi prayer.)
It is an experience of needing to embrace the pain and process it. To let yourself feel and own the sorrow for what it cost Him to redeem you. This is how we foster sincere contrition and grow in our devotion.
How can we prayerfully grieve like the angel? Are we attuned to how our sins contributed to the Passion of Christ and do we palpably feel sorrow for them? Our emotions are not something to be feared but felt and understood so they can be ordered and expressed appropriately.
Emotions inform us of what is going on inside in ways we are not always conscious of. While feeling emotions are not necessary for prayer to be efficacious and fruitful, it is helpful to develop a healthy understanding of how our emotions, particularly sorrow and grief, manifest in us in order to know how they can be most prudently expressed.
When we learn to unite our grief and sorrow with Christ, as so beautifully depicted by the angels in the marble “Deposition”, we can also avoid the risk of repressing our feelings which can often rear its head in the form of bitterness and depression, creating a wave of potentially unhealthy expressions or even sins. (At the end I’ll list some resources for some deeper exploration in understanding emotions.)
For now, take a moment to be that angel and hide yourself from the distracting chaos of the world and press into His shoulder that carried your sins so willingly and lovingly.
“You are my hiding place.” Psalm 32:7
Just rest there for a minute.
Sense His anticipation for the joy of redeeming you, before you were even born and before you could offer any sorrow.
With your guardian angel’s help, think of one sorrow you can unburden yourself with and then acknowledge that He has already absorbed that for you so you can let it go. Exhale it all out. Write it down if it helps so you don’t have to carry it in your head or heart and save it for your next confession if needed.
Ask the Holy Spirit to help you feel sincere sorrow and express it in a prayer or devotional act like kissing a crucifix with love.
When you’re ready, let yourself feel relief and gratitude, and offer a prayer of thanksgiving.
Self-Reflection:
Is grieving or expressing sorrow hard for you? Is it perhaps an emotion that you try to avoid? How do you think that began?
No affiliates here, just some good resources I’ve found helpful from Catholic authors if you’re interested in digging deeper:
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Photography, drawing, and text by Renata Grzan Wieczorek. All Rights Reserved. Visit my About page for more information on usage.